I was listening to the radio a couple of days ago and the DJ was asking the women listeners if we thought men were sexist if they opened doors, pulled out chairs, and paid for dates. If you've read my former posts you probably already know where I stand
on this topic. But humor me for a bit, won't you?
What do women want?!
That question has probably been on the minds of every man since Adam. I am here to give you an up-close and personal peek into the mind of a woman. I will admit that I am
not necessarily the norm, but I'll share what I know from my own experiences.
Guys have it rough! That's right. I said it.
If we women aren't overthinking and questioning everything, talking incessantly about next to nothing, playing mind games
(Do we really want an honest answer to, " Does this make me look fat?"), being indecisive, taking way too long to find the perfect...(well insert pretty much anything here), we are never in full agreement with each other about what is considered sexist as
what is considered just good manners...or heaven forbid, romantic.
I, being moderately old fashioned myself, like a man who kicks it old school. Although I don't at all mind paying for dinner, it is nice when my date offers. When said date opens doors
for me, my first thought has never been, "Wow...what a sexist jerk! What could conceivably make him think that I can't open a closed door all by myself?" No. That is complete and utter lunacy. I generally find it commendable and downright charming.
we shouldn't want is a man who is callous, bad tempered, cruel, selfish, dangerous, narcissistic, and violent; masked in what we view as "the perfect guy." I'm here to tell you that there is no prefect guy.
I could go on and on about what I don't want.
Having lived through some of the worst acts to be done to a woman and barely surviving, it is very easy for me to appreciate when a man is actually genuine, sweet, trustworthy, open, and yes, kind enough to open doors and pull out chairs. It speaks a great
deal to his character.
I will say this to enquiring minds. Please be yourself, fellas. Don't pretend to be someone you aren't. There is being respectful. Then there is putting on a good show to get the girl. If you set the bar high in the very beginning
you are setting yourself and us up for failure if you don't plan on following through. I would rather have honesty over old fashioned any day. It saves a lot of time and a great deal of hurt for all involved.
My brother was always considered the "nice"
guy back in high school. It really bothered him. I remember telling him to stay true to himself and that he only needed one girl to appreciate him for him. He found that in his wife and they've been married nearly 15 years.
So as a woman, I concede
we truly suck sometimes. What do we want? The answer is quite simple. We have no idea!!
Ask a hundred women and chances are you'll get a hundred different answers. (If we women can't figure it out, how can we possibly expect the men in our lives to)?
But I will promise you this. If you are true to who you are and honest with yourself and with us, you will find the one girl who really loves you for you. It's not quantity when it really matters. It's quality.
So good luck, gentlemen. And ladies, maybe
give the poor fellas a break now and then. There's an awfully good chance you won't be disappointed!